Bacon. Brownies.

Most exciting things!

I made bacon brownies and Moutain Dew cupcakes!

The brownies turned out surprisingly well. Honestly, I didn't know what to expect so I just made a test batch of 4. I must say, they were quite good!
Bacon brownies with chocolate maple frosting. Its a wonderful thing.

The Mt. Dew cupcakes turned out alright too. They were kind of ugly, so I do have to work on the colors a little bit. But other than that, they were wonderful!

Just in case.

If you are interested in purchasing them, you can find them at www.pixelpastries.webs.com.

Now I just need to continue my quest for old action figures!
Yay!




Fun fact of the day:

The letter "e" is the most commonly used letter in the English language. The novel Gadsby, by Ernest Vincent Wright does not contain the letter "e" throughout the entire book.

I Do What I Must Because I Can

Another day goes by,

always with more things to do

An angry morning.

I have shanghaied the Culinary's computer lab in order to gain some form of Internet access. At least I can check my bank account now, since I lost my debit card AGAIN.

Thankfully it is all in order and my card is now cancelled with a new one on the way.

Someday I will make a dress out of all of my debit cards that I have gone through.

A visit to Stop N Shop proved successful, and again they twisted my arm into buying 10/10 candy bars. Dirty bastards.

Tonight I feel that I will be making a cake. This sounds like a good plan to me. Perhaps when I go home, after I clean up after Hurricane SpaceMarine and finish picking bids of Kameamea** Testosteroni* pizza out of the carpeting.

Ironically, my GPS has gone missing and I can't seem to find it, or the cord. It seems as through someone may have taken it out of my car. A bad decision on their part.

All things aside, my new job begins tomorrow.

I quit working at Mohonk Want To Kill Yourself And Everyone Around You House and will now be working at an undisclosed location, cheffing it up.

And yes, this means that I will not be finishing my externship, which means that yes, I will not be returning to the Culinary Institute, and yes, I am very happy about this.

Goal: write for Game Informer magazine.

*chicken, bacon, ham, ground beef, sausage, steak, pepperoni. Weighs about as much as a small pit-bull.

**with pineapple

I Pose A Theory.

Today I had a horrifying experience.
As a Pagan and an ex-vegan, I still feel the need to treat nature well and with respect, regardless of the situation, but unfortunately work today seemed to focus mainly on the demise of small animals.
Working in a bakery, it is only natural to have mice show up now and again. To me, I figure as long as they aren't getting into the food and making a mess, it should be okay. Unfortunately, the entire reason mice go to places in the first place is so that they can get into the food and consequently, make a mess. Therefor the mice had to go. The proper way to handle this kind of situation would have been to order enclosed traps and relocate the mice to a nearby field, which we have plenty of. I do understand that there are 1. too many mice, and 2. not enough time to do this. So, in the end this means that they must be killed. As much as I don't like the idea of this, it is understood. Personally, I have no problem disposing of a dead mouse. To be honest, I am a little bit afraid of the living ones since I got bit by one as a kid. Though a dead one doesn't bother me. Since this is the case, I was elected head of Mouse Disposal Crew. Actually, I was the only member of mouse disposal crew, due to the fact that we have other things to do other than play with dead mice, and also that they had to be quickly removed since they were decaying and the whole place smelled horribly of dead rodent. Sad to say, I can identify the smell of dead rodent very well.
Moving right along.
As I go to dispose of what I thought would be one or two dead mice in snap traps, I find that my employers have decided to use the least humane form of trap possible: a glue trap. And little did I know that there were not one or two mice, but seven. Two of which were still a alive and stuck in the little gooey trays.
As previously mentioned, it was a horrifying experience to see the small creature staring up at me with its shining, beaded eyes, with it's nose and feet stuck in a thick layer of gel. It immediately began squirming and tugging in fear as I approached. Feeling there was no kind of polite way to dispose of it, I placed a paper towel over the entire tray, covering both the living mouse and the couple dead ones that lay stuck next to it. At this point I was unsure of what to do. Do I put it in the plastic bag and let it suffocate slowly? Do I quickly end it's life by stepping on it? I felt that the second would have been the nicer thing to do, but on the other hand who am I to play God and take a life? it is not my choice when something should die. So instead I tied it into the plastic bag and tossed it into the dumpster. Perhaps the poor creature will free itself from the trap and make its way into a safe dumpster haven. As unlikely as this is, I can hope. The only thing worse than the one still wriggling, was the small mouse that had to have only been a few days old. No larger than my thumb he stood stuck in the glue, ribs fluctuating with each panicked breath as my hand drew closer to pick up the tray. The saddest part of the whole experience was the fact that this small one began squeaking in terror, trying to escape. This was not something I would like to have to do again, although I do know that there is another glue trap in the back room.
Scary that this all happened by 7:00 am.
As the day progressed we had several, and by several I mean anywhere between 5 and 8 people woth arms bigger around than my head, come in to install our new proof box. How exciting. Lucky for me, my space was taken over and I had to relocate to a different table right in the way of every person that walked by with a huge piece of the metal box. Please note my sarcasm. We usually have seven or so people working at the same time in our bake shop, occasionally a dishwasher or another employee from a different part of the building will come in. Today we ended up with a total of 15 people in the room at once. Mind you, this bakeshop is not very large.
One of my co-workers then said "In a perfect world, we would be working at different times." Meaning the bakers and the men that were installing the proof box.
This then got me thinking "What is a perfect world?"
I pondered this thought for quite a while as I put danishes and cinnamon rolls on a tray.
I then finally come to the conclusion that we already live in a perfect world, everything is perfect as it is. This theory is still in the works, considering that I haven't had anyone to discuss this yet, but so far I can not think of a reason why this world is not perfect. Yes, I understand that each individual person is not perfect, but people as a whole are. But then you must break that down. Are only half of the people perfect? No, because no one is perfect. And if no one is perfect, then there is nothing above imperfect. We know nothing greater than imperfection. And if there is nothing greater than imperfection, then imperfection is indeed perfection. If there were anything that was indeed 100% perfect, that would then make something else obsolete. And obsoletion is imperfection. Imperfection is necessary for perfection. Again, I am still testing this theory and I welcome any criticisms and will answer or reply to them in later posts.

Cut This Cake Into Pieces, I Work At A Resort

Finally got home at a reasonable hour today.
What a miracle.
But Im still really tired.
And need to buy groceries.
But, I went to the bank to cash my second check, and this is definitely a good thing, to be able to pay for gas, yes?

Lucky for me I did not burn anything today and I made some badass baklava.
Yeah, baklava.
Be badass.


And some self proclaimed fat 17 year old boy is trying to convince me to download msn so he can 'show me his pair"
Back the fuck off, son!


I hate the Internet.

Don't Touch This!

Lack of updates? Definitely.

Why?

Lack of sleep.

Why?

Job.

Of course.

For those of you that don't know, I have started my my externship at Mohonk Mountain House. Seems like a decent place for the most part, yeah?

Exception: being there by 6 am.

Meaning I need to wake up at 4 am.

Can I real quick get a "no bueno!"?

The hour-long car ride doesn't really help, though I have been making it there at exceptional times! Luckily this job hasn't been as bad as I thought and I only came home crying once. Also, I got to make food for Steven King, which is nothing to complain about, really. made some awesome cheesecakes, some blood orange curd tartlets, and quite a lot of other things over these passed few days. And today was my first day off. It was nice to get to sleep in and I am happy to know that I do force myself to wake up by 4:30 now, automatically, which means I am getting used to the schedule. Now if only I could get home at 3:30 like we originally planned, instead of 6:30 or 7:00 like I have been doing recently.

And speaking of the drive there, tomorrow Michele and I are going to get 2 for $3 Egg McMuffins. Hell. Yes. This is an exciting day for me.

We also had our training the other day and oh how I wish I could find the training videos they made us watch. One was about not touching other people's syringes or bloody razors if we happen to come across them while working. so pretty much the whole idea of the video was something along the lines of "Don't put your hands where you can't see them, or you will get AIDS".

Well, if I had a nickle!

Another video was on how not to hurt your back.

Awesome, thanks for telling me all of this now.

On a completely different note, I have found a recent obsession with an incredibly stupid website called Habbo Hotel. It's really lame and rather boring, but it is something to do when I'm just sitting around. It's pretty much like a really ghetto beta version of The Sims. To be perfectly honest, it really isn't even all that fun and to do anything cool you have to pay, which is something I am not willing to do to play a game online.

But I digress.

I finally got to sleep in today, my next day off isn't until next Sunday, so I am going to go look around for something to eat. I'm thinking...bagels.

ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWN!

I have 68 hours to have everything packed and be OUT of my dorm room. This isn't even funny.
We just got the news that there needs to be a deposit for electric. awesome.
I have 15 minutes before class. So much to do. Not nearly enough time for any of this. Thankfully we're finishing desserts today, tomorrow we get them all ready for grand buffet, which isn't too bad. Then on Friday we have graduation where we will be helping serve the food for the graduates.
And on top of this, I am getting an AWESOME ear infection.
Hooray.
Hopefully I'll actually have something positive to write about soon.
But. I will have pictures of the apartment to put up soon.
Maybe some pics of me and Van?
I don't know if I want all you creeps to know exactly what I look like.

(See, right here I would normally put a winking smiley face, but I hate using those in blogs.)
Anyway, gotta run.
Time to put the mirror glaze on some lemon lime curd & cream cheese mousse.

SUCKS TO YOUR ASSMAR!

Starwars kick? Yes.
Watched Fanboys yesterday, it was hilarious.
Aside.

Class.
Last class.
8 days left.
Last class.
Bad class.
Fuck class.
Good class.
Big problems.




Dear Darth Vader,
I am writing to inform you that you are not my father.


As much as you would like to believe that you are, I must tell you the truth.
As much as you would like to think that you have some authority over me, you do not.
Even if you did, I do not believe in authority, regardless.
I have been trained by multiple Sith lords and Emperors. The same ones that trained you, as a matter of fact.
It would be greatly appreciated, Lord Vader, if you would please cease to attempt teaching me the ways of the Jedi when you, Sir, are of the dark side. I know my ways far better than you do. We are equally matched in art of wielding light sabers, so please keep your technique under your mask and I shall do the same.
Please, do not try to re-teach me my fortes, I am capable of doing so myself. Your haughty attitude and "prestigious" mindset impress no one but yourself. Had you not been blowing the Sith Lords they would have no use for you. Please refrain from speaking to me again, for you are of no use to me.
(Not) Yours Truely,
Skellyton Skywalker
PS- You should do something about that Asthma.

Bitches Love Me 'Cause They Know That I Can Rock.

What an awesome weekend, really!
It started out rocky, because of my practical. I definitely did NOT do as well as I hoped. Applestrip is not my forte, apparently, but I did know that ahead of time. It's amazing what nerves can do to you.
I don't have a picture of what it's supposed to look like, but I do have a picture that shows what it did look like.



Jabba no like-a apple strip! Jee panwa waffmula chone patogga che lickmoomoo!



But then after class Van and I went to the movies and saw Wolverine.
Can I mention...the awesome?
It was pretty good. not my favorite of all of them, but it was really good none the less.
Deadpool was in it, so that just made it awesome. And Gambit.

We then came home, slept, woke up the next morning and lazed around for a bit, which is always really nice. The weather has been great.
Theeeeeeennnn we went to the Melting Pot. Aaaaahhhhh. Delicious. More food that we even knew what to do with. It was an incredibly nice night. And I definitely brought one of the fondue forks home.


And that's only 1/3 of it. talk about being a fat kid! Mmmmm.

We hardly made it home on such full stomachs. We definitely learned how contagious yawning really is.

Sunday was rainy, so no baseball, but we did have RP night and made food and kicked vampire ass.

DAMN.

I just went back and read what I wrote.

Starwars (mentioning Jabba the Hutt, and Huttese)

XMen (mentioning several of the characters)

RPing (self explanatory)

Vampires

I am the biggest nerd on the face of the planet.

But I digress.

I will spend most of the day packing up my dorm, since I am leaving in 3 weeks. it's about time that I start putting things in boxes and bags so it's not a complete disaster being put off until the last possible second. So I'll get a lot of my clothing packed up.

I'm really excited for my next class.

I finished cakes (just barely!)

and I am now going into Individual Production Pastries. My favorite!

it should be an awesome class.

Now, for something completely out there and incoherent. I only know of one, maybe 2 people that will understand this. Van and I talked a little bit about it yesterday, I believe.

I really wish people could know certain things about me. I really can't say or explain what they are, for my own safety and sanity, but lets call it an illness.

I really wish that the people I associate with, work with or come in contact with could see that I have this illness. It would help them understand why I act the way I do, do the things I do, say what I say. They would be able to understand my actions, everything would make so much more sense. it would be exponentially helpful to both myself and people around me, but it's really not that easy. Van made the point of saying that if everyone could see that I was this way, that would just give them one more thing to latch on to and pick apart. And this is true, but i would have to wonder if it would be worth it. It would almost be like wearing a medical ID bracelet that said I was bipolar, or something similar. People would understand why I act the way I do, but on the other hand it would be more likely that they would treat me differently, perhaps negatively, because they knew that about me.

But, they would understand little things like why I don't speak to people when I'm angry, why I act incredibly nonchalant when something goes wrong and why it seems like I don't care about anything. Why I paint, why I write, why I play music when something in wrong. Why I don't talk about my problems, ever. I know it upsets people on occasion when I don't tell them why I am upset or what is bothering me. It just goes with that. It goes with my nature, and it goes with my, for lack of a better term, "illness". If I could get rid of it, sometimes I think I would. But I have a feeling that someday I may need it for something. We'll see.

*BAMF!*

Post 101

This here is my 101st blog post.
Not too shabby for only having this since November.

Good news: got my extern, fer sure. training agreement and everything.
SO, come July 1st, I will be working at Mohonk Mountain House.
Only 30 minutes away from here.
Exciting, no?
It should be awesome.




Now it's time for some



SUBLIMINAL MESSAGING

*cough*

Let The Bodies Hit The Floor

Awesome luck yesterday. I think not.
Within the first 30 minutes of class I managed to hit the floor. Campus safety took me to the hospital, which was, as usual, a miserable experience.
The doctors, after forgetting about me again, told me that I had passed out for absolutely no reason what so ever. Then sent me back to school after being in a hospital bed for 3+ hours. Quite a large amount of SUCK that was. So much for making carrot cake.
I don't even know what happened. I remember mumbling that I didn't feel too good, getting tunnel vision, then having some really weird dream that I think actually was about carrots. Next thing I know, I wake up and there are people standing around me, the school nurse was already there. First thing she says: "You're really pale."
First thing I say: "Can I have that bucket?" then "Mom's gonna say I have swine flu..."
But lets rewind real quick.
"You're really pale."


...

...naaaaaaaaaah.


"Your heart rate is very low..."



...really?


Random people from the class: "Your eyes stayed open when you went down..."


Maybe I'm a fish.


Anyway.
Took me to the doctor, they covered me in wires and stickers, kept asking me if I wanted a blanket (because there was no POSSIBLE way I could have passed out from heat?) and 2 hours later asked if I was dehydrated and needed to be hooked up to fluids.
Awesome. Way to go St. Francis.

So then I went back to school and ate some chicken tenders.

On the walk back from my dorm there was this HUGE hawk eating baby birds out of a nest. I wish I had a better camera to take a picture with, but all I had was my phone. Oh well.

Not bad for a camera phone.

But I swear, that bird was STARING ME DOWN.
I was going to be his next snack.

Yeah, well today I was going to eh.ermmeh.mermer...*flicks leg*

How I managed to get sunburn while sitting in the shade for about an hour is beyond me. Awesome luck? I think so.

It might be time to find sunscreen that won't destroy my skin and start coating myself in it from head to toe. Ugh.

Thankfully it doesn't hurt, even though it will take weeks for it to heal up.

Many (if any) of you may be asking "Well what were YOU, blogger girl, doing out in the sun anyway? By the sound of it, it doesn't seem like you're going to be trying out of Survivor any time soon."

IIIII was outside. In the daylight (gasp!), watching my friends play baseball. Yep, I was watching people play baseball, sitting under trees, and still managed a to get a little bit of a burn. This isn't all that surprising coming from the girl that gets sunburns from sitting in a car with tinted windows, but anyway. Yes, baseball. And it was very fun. Perhaps I will watch them play baseball more often and bring a good camera to take better pictures. I only got crappy ones on my cell phone.

And I am currently listening to Madonna.

Hell yes.

And eating very stale peeps. But I feel like shit, so when I puke, I'll puke up a huge orange brick. AWESOME. Hopefully I'll finish with this costing soon enough. Its really very overwhelming, but when you break it down, it's really not so bad. It should go well.

Off I go. perhaps more to write later.

Tersen edriin bayar hurgeye!

Happy Birthday Genghis Khan.
We do not know Genghis Khan's actual birthday. It was said that he was born in either early summer or late winter. This makes me sad. no one even remembered his birthday.
I will make him a birthday cake and I will give him a birthday. Every Mongol needs some love.
I have decided that today is his birthday. I think today is the 17th of April.
So, the 17th of April is officially Genghis Khan's birthday.
Happy Birthday Genghis.
I iwill make him a cake.
The end. Time for lunch.

Pokemon "Kangaskhan" (like a kangaroo?). Perhaps to commemorate Mr. Genghis. Perhaps not. Goodbye.

I'm sorry Genghis

your birthday was forgotten

a pokemon, though?

Do You Remember How It Was When You Bled?

And I'm still a cigarette softly smoking on the edge of a metal ashtray
I begged this place to let me burn, and it whispered,
"burn away."

I've been in cakes class for two days now and I have yet to see a cake.
I have been coated in chocolate and grease cream, but I haven't made a cake. apparently I'm making 8 today though. I guess we'll see.

I hope today is a better day. yesterday was rough.
Ill just make some cakes and frangipan, and everything will be okay.


Oh, and a silly facebook thing
"pick 5 people you have been told you look like"
bahahaa.
My one friend picks
"Teddy bears, werewolf, chewbacca, Shaggy from scooby doo and Brad Pitt."

Mine was
Kirsten Dundst, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Lindsay Lohan, Ginger Foutly and Brody Dalle.
Go figure.haha.


Just finished all my homework. im coated in grease cream. Ewwwww.
And I am hungry. Again.
I swear, it really does take 3 bloodpoints for me to wake up. I be it takes bloodpoints for me to walk.
I need to get an IV or food, pumping continuously into my stomach. it's ridiculous.


Also, 3 of my friends have gotten engaged?! And 3 have gotten married?! I don't understand. Its really exciting for them, but I wonder if it is from the culture they grew up in. Going to Christian school and being raised as a Christian they have something to 'solidify' their relationship by saying that its what God wants, or God told them that they're supposed to be together. I don't know. Maybe not. its just amazing that 6 people I know, that are my age, are engaged or married already. Wow.

Anyway off to class.

Like a little girl on a bed that was years ago deceased

Facebook:
4 friends have become a fan of God.
Become a fan!

Even God has a fanpage on facebook?
This confuses me a little bit. I wonder how often he updates...

Clicked 'next':
4 friends have become a fan of Jesus.
Become a fan!

Er...
Clicked 'next'

4 friends have become a fan of sleeping.
Become a fan!

So, my friends are fans of God, Jesus, and sleeping...this...seems odd...
"next"

...

C.S Lewis...4 friends are a fan of C.S. Lewis


Then, out of no where

4 friends are a fan of Seth Rogan.

So, Seth Rogan is right up there with God, Jesus, Sleeping and C.S Lewis.

And those were all the friend suggestions Facebook had for me. I think Facebook should mind it's own business and not make such drastic suggestions.
Way to be subtle, Facebook, then way to try and back pedal by throwing Seth Rogan in there.
You aren't fooling me.


Moving right along.
I have quite a bit of homework. It makes me laugh.

"Pipe 4 different designs, write Happy Birthday and put a border, make a marzipan rose"
That's my homework. Awesome.

So I'm going to do that now.


Holy shit...

Song:The Divine Suicide Of K
Band:Protest The Hero
Album:Kezia

The Divine Suicide Of K

If I Had A Gun, I'd Pump Your Ethics Full Of Lead

Printers may very well be the spawn of Satan (...). Rarely do I ever come across one that works in a simple and efficient way. I somehow managed to just print out twice as many things as I needed in the worst format of all time, and still didn't get all of it done. One would think that after paying mumblemumblemumblesomeoddthousand dollars to go to school at this place, they would at least give us books or papers that had all the information we needed on them, instead of making us buy a printer, ink, paper, etc to print it out. The closest thing they offer is having a place where you pay to have them print all your crap out and half the time it isn't right.

New class today. Cakes.
Boooo.
I'm plenty happy sitting on my floor eating popcorn and mangoes and listening to Protest The Hero. I'd rather be doing that. Having a lazy day.
Ah well. I guess Ill go learn to make more cakes.

His life is an exciting adventure.

Get Me A Muzzle...

We had the It's Super Effective reunion tour today. What a good time. Sitting around and bullshitting about my old high school, about our lives now, and about the injustices of life. And about Watchmen. I, of course, made the most epic of blunders, as usual.

"Have you seen The Watchmen yet?"
"No! I really want to. Though I heard there is a lot of blue wang."
"Oh. Ha, yeah, there is a lot of blue wang. Dr. Manhattan walks around naked a lot...
(A few seconds later)
It's really long...
...
...Wait! No! The movie! Not..the...wang...

...you know what I mean..."


Go me.

And again, with my blunders. I made yet another. In my attempt to speak French.
We all know I do not speaka Frencha.


Here is what I tried to say:

"I am trying to speak french I do not speak french But I am trying. I am speaking french to say I love you in french. The first time I translated this, It translated to Dutch. You do not speak Dutch. I am sorry if I wake you up. Have a good day, my wonderful and favorite hermit crab"



This is what it said to say:

"J'essaye de parler français Je ne parle pas français Mais j'essaye Je parle français pour dire je t'aime en français La première fois que j'ai traduit ceci, il a traduit au Néerlandais. Vous ne parlez pas néerlandais que je suis désolé si je vous réveille Ayez un beau jour, mon bernard l'ermite merveilleux et préféré"

I then sent that text message, not really thinking.
I then looked to check and see how correct it was.

This is what it really said:

"J' try to speak French I do not speak French But j' I test speak French to say I t' like in French the first time that j' translated this, it translated for the Netherlander. You do not speak Dutch that I am sorry if I awake you Have one beautiful day, my Bernard l' marvellous and preferred hermit"


A for effort, right?

Oh, Dairy Queen is open again, and they have grab bags. (see one of my previous posts: "Grab Bags" for more information.)
Definitely got some ice cream that's still in the freezer. It is not chicken flavored.

Oh. One more blunder.
I successfully managed to rip the tire open on the car. Along with scratch the rim and break part of the bumper. I really don't know how that could have possibly happened because I really didn't hit the curb that hard. I don't think my parents believe me, but that's up to them whether they do or not. I know how hard I hit something. It was no different than any other time you run over the curb. I honestly don't understand how it could have done so much damage. I did hit my head pretty hard though, but I didn't mention that to my parents, they probably would have just freaked out more and believed me less about how hard I hit the curb. Oh well. I'm just happy that I somehow forced myself to not Frisbee my dinner plate through the sliding glass door like I wanted to. its nice to be home for a while, until I sit down at the dinner table. For some reason, sitting at the dinner table just makes me want to leave. Maybe because 95% of bad conversations happened at the dinner table, even since I was a kid. The other 5% were either in the car or in some other place, probably in the doorway of my room or the computer room. For some reason all the fighting happens at the table. When I have my own house, I will not have a dinner table. Dinner tables just lead to bad things. I want to go back to school now.

I need to go work out again. Perhaps in the morning. My hair feels like spaghetti and I'm getting into one of those moods where I want to cut it all off. Hopefully I won't give in and do that again, I'm trying to grow it out because I think I might actually look pretty again if I do.
I got some new clothes today, but I really just felt like crap the whole time I was shopping. Something about clothing stores makes any shred of self esteem I had just disintegrate. I really can't wait until I am pretty again. I miss how I used to look.
More like this, less like I do now. Someday. Maybe after I get out of school and I start working more and having more of a life. Who knows.

Alright, I'm done being upset. Lets be happy.
I've gotten close to 400 new songs today on my itunes and I'm not even finished yet! Im going to have all kinds of great stuff to listen to at school now. And I'll go and buy some blank CDs and I'll make people mix cd's and they'll all be happy, and then I'll be happy because they're happy. And tomorrow I'm going to the grocery store!! I love t he grocery store! And Ill make my mom a tart for her birthday. She wont decide what she wants so I'm just going to have to make something up. I think Ill probably make some kind of cake and some pate a choux to decorate it with or something. I really don't know. I have an idea for it, but I'm not sure yet. Oh well, I guess we'll see tomorrow. I heard a funny song about Toast today...that's exciting, yes?

I think I am going to go make crepes...

gelée de chaux d'ananas

So I had another practical yesterday. Thankfully I actually passed this one. (Made 2 keylime tarts. They were okay) One more today. Its written. Its going to be lame. Then I have to make ham and cheese muffins.

Gross.

There is some lime jello.

Unfortunately there are 16 chunks of pineapple.

But I found a solution to that problem.

Moving along.

I will be going home this weekend. Not too sure what I'm doing. Making a cake for my moms birthday and perhaps also taking back a lot of things from here that I don't need in the dorm any more. I should do that, I think.

There are exactly 3 weeks left until my big practical. Hopefully it will go well. 6 weeks until I go on extern. I need to turn in my application, I just don't have enough references yet. I'm working on that.

I think I have a project to work on when I go home. The idea just crossed my mind.

But I don't think the trees are nice enough to do so yet. perhaps the next time I go home. Off to think.

Apologies for the lack of substance.

Maybe Someday...

Today sucked. I'm not even going to lie. It really really did. It was alright until I got to class. At that point, it all just started falling downhill.

I had to make biscotti for my practical. I fucking hate biscotti. No one likes biscotti. Fuck biscotti. With my awesome phonetic skills, I successfully managed to misread and totally destroy the recipe by attempting to make chocolate chip biscotti instead of chocolate. Sooo I had to figure out how to somehow change chocolate chip into chocolate. Little did I realize that one require baking soda while the other required baking powder. And on top of all of this, the oven I used broke without my knowledge. Needless to say I had some really shitty biscotti. Needless to say, I failed my exam. Awesome. Two more to go, though.

After class I went to the gym again.
It was later this time, it was pretty full. As soon as I walked in the room, I instantly felt as if I had transformed from human to meat. I walked in, and I just wasn't even a person anymore. I ignored this and just put in my headphones and listened to my music while I ran and lifted weights. But I could still see the people just staring at me and watching me lift weights and just look at me in ways I really prefer to not be looked at in. I really made me feel like shit. I was actually a bit self conscious as I was lifting; not because I can't lift much, but just because I could tell how a lot of the guys were staring. It really made me feel shitty. I don't even take it as a compliment anymore.
And then of course, I had Broski and Beaver stop by to hang out a bit. A few lines were crossed with some things that were said. Starting with something that had happened one night when I had been drinking and did some ridiculous and regrettable things that I honestly did not know happened. And of course I had a few of those empty blank spaces in my mind were filled in about what really did happen that time. Nothing that I am happy about nor proud of, nor really wanted to remember. Especially aloud in a room full of other people that honestly did not need to know about all of that. Continuing on, I also learned that I was the fulfiller of a couple 'guy fantasies', which truth be told made me feel absolutely sick and disgusted with myself. Strangely, at this point i can understand why I look like a half-rack of spare ribs to someone.
I'm going to bed.
fuck it.




Do you remember how it was when you bled? When you loved and burned in those flames that you've kept because Vesta's long been sleeping . And now you've come to accept that your anatomy defines more than a few of the gaping holes in our social fabric; more than a few one night stands, more than a few prison bars melted into wedding bands.
We've made you all the peasants and we've made ourselves the kings, our queens are still subordinate as an angel without wings .We make it easy to belong which means it's easy to be wrong "Put some plastic in your tits, and you'd look better as a blond." I remember when you were hopeful and you never thought your life would be lived inside a coffin with a moral sacrifice and a million social obligations, labels and expectations. You were young and modern seventeen in vogue and vague pursuit of a cosmopolitan dream. When you bled on the bed as you fed those expectations as a whore and not a human, you embraced with hesitation the very parameters of all you can be; not a mother, not an aunt, not a sister who's not subdued, because dignity's not physical and your flesh means more than you. I know we'll wake up one day with a gun to the back of our brains. You'll be asking for your rib and I'll smile and call you brave. Maybe someday when this bloody skull has dried I'll know our city is in ruins when our greatest source of pride is a monument of dicks and ribs and gender crowns we wore where underneath, a plaque will read, "No woman is a whore."

Band: Protest The Hero
Song: Turn Soonest To The Sea
Album: Kezia

turn soonest to the sea - Protest the Hero

*edit
And I just found out that Protest The Hero is playing with The Number 12 Looks Like You in the city on May 9th. Hooooolllyyyyy shit. Forget going to see GWAR. I am saving all my money and trecking my ass down there. Best. Line-up. Ever. (Misery Signals, Scales The Summit, Falls From Grace will also be there.) Ohgodohgodohgod.

C is for...

like bamboo torture
chocolate chips under the nails
a sweet Vietnam

Every day I dread going to this class. Cookies. Cookies, cookies, cookies. Cookies.
Cookies.
I can not deal with them anymore. I am halfway through the block being over, which is a good thing, but never the less.
I cannot believe that I am spending all of this time and money to not get any better at baking...cookies.
Honestly, I like the ones I make at home better. I feel like I am learning absolutely nothing. It seems to be a waste of time. And I definitely almost dropped a knife through my leg yesterday. Somehow it flipped over and landed handle-down. Then I almost stabbed a guy that went running by me without warning. Bad call.
Perhaps the next class with be better.
My goal is to go to the store and get gum paste and practice more so I can get better at making flowers and things so I will do better if I get my extern. Hopefully that will all work out.
But enough about school. That subject grows wearisome after a while.


If I were a superhero, I would be Fever Cat.


"Who is Fever Cat?" You ask?
Fever Cat is the ultimate superhero!
Kind of.
Not really.
Here is a picture.
Oh the awesome that she is. Pouncing unsuccessfully from treebrance to treebranch, infecting small children with strep throat and the flu, drinking ungodly amounts of orange juice, just to throw it up on your favorite shoes in a few hours. My mom says that Stan Lee might buy it. Ill have to pitch it to him.


I am currently listening to the Misfits yet again. I have a playlist of songs that Im working on learning how to play on guitar, Saturday Night was one of them. I learned it though and now play it acoustic sometimes. Someday I might actually work up the guts to sing in front of people. That is highly, highly unlikely. I believe I will have to be mildly inebriated to do that.
Someday.


I really feel like Im just writing the same things over and over again on here. I really with I could think of something better to write about. I need to go back and reread the things that I used to write about so I can get a better feel of what is more interesting, because honestly, no one wants to hear about what I'm doing with my life or how my day went. I have a feeling people would rather read about zombie attacks or mall goths. I don't know when the next post about reality TV shows will be, considering I don't own a television that plays TV shows. it only plays video games and movies. But really, it just seems to be collecting dust, because I rarely use it. I really don't like televisions, they rot the mind. Though it would be nice to be more informed. Apparently there was a salmonella outbreak in pistachios. I wish I had known this before I ate them. So, if there are no posts for a while....

blame the pistachios.


Until then!

Slap The Bass

Interview for extern today. Im going to go check out the place and if its good then I will apply and hope to get hired. I really hope it works out, I want to stay in the area. Broski is driving me there and back for my interview, then we'll probably try to meet up with this angry wiccan girl that lives on campus. And after that is White Castle adventure. Woooooo.

I've never been to White Castle. I think it's a hamburger place. And Im down with that.

Last night Van and I went to the movies and saw I Love You, Man. It was a good one. Worth seeing, definitely. We're both really stoked for the new X-Men movie. Its gonna be sick. Can we just take a moment to say "yum"?

X-Men might be my favorite set of superheroes. Mostly because they didn't choose to be the way they are (generally), most of them were born that way (though Logan was kind of...enhanced.) and they didn't get their powers by accident, like Spiderman or the Hulk. they all just started out as kids that could do unusual things and they chose to ignore it, enhance it, and use if for good or for bad. And, for the most part, their powers only effect their appearance subtly (Mystique, Beast, and Nightcrawler not included, along with a few others). I also like in the movies how they aren't wearing such costume-y outfits (e.i yellow spandex). I did not like, however, that Mystique was running around naked. (Well, I did..but...)

*ahem*

Moving on.

I made a lot of cookies last night.

and I no longer have a desire to write anything right now. I got distracted.
Time to go find something to eat.