Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Ling Ling, my ass!

As humans, many of us work hard to keep our environment clean, healthy and alive.
We have National Parks, reservations, endangered wildlife funds and various research projects all to make sure that our planet will last forever.

At a very young age, we are told that we should respect the environment. You know, "don't litter", "conserve water" and of course "recycle".

We are also told that every being on the planet has its own special use. Every organism plays its own unique role in the environment and that all of it should be protected and saved.


Well I beg to differ, because I have found an exception:






Pandas.
Fucking pandas.
Those smarmy, self righteous bastards.
Of all creatures on this earth, pandas are the ones that serve no use to the ecosystem.
They do not produce anything useful (except for shit, which can apparently be made into souvenirs...), they don't serve as prey for anything and they don't keep any kind of population in check.
Bamboo population? Yeah right. That shit grows faster than mold on a week old burrito. Pandas or not bamboo is going to flourish. There is so much bamboo and so few pandas that they don't even count.
Pandas. Serve. No. Use.
On top of being useless, they're little bitches, too.
Everyone thinks they're so cute and cuddly,
THEY'RE FUCKING BEARS, PEOPLE!
Do you not realize this?
There is no difference between


and

They're both bears, they're both huge and they both want to tear your limbs off.
Just because they look like fat mimes doesn't mean they're friendly. Or in an invisible box.
Below is a video of a lucky man.


Long story short; fuck pandas.

1 comment:

Ashelle said...

I laughed then gasped at the vicious video. Pandas aren't so cute anymore.