Tuesday, December 28, 2010

I Will Lose My Shit If Just One More Person I Know Dies.

All the people's mouths are moving
All you hear are car alarms.

This is getting ridiculous.

Friday, December 17, 2010


Finally some good news! Just what I've been looking for!

Again, I have to keep things vague, just for safe-keeping,
but at least there's a little bit of hope in the future.

So far today, I have:

Tidied up a little bit
Made lunch/dinner with enough for leftovers tomorrow
Cleaned and reorganized my hookah and shisha collection
Found the perfect gift for Van's birthday
Called into the phone company to sort out some issues

I feel pretty productive.

Work at 7 today, until 11, which is kind of shitty, but its hours, so I can't complain too much.
I also need to call Microsoft AGAIN because they've been charging my bank account for no reason.

Easy enough.

Today I also found this article, which made my day and began step one to my "Hope in Humanity Restoration" project (which doesn't actually exist, by the way.)

This awesome guy named Dragan drunkenly jumped into the ocean off of a high-dive and killed an enormous shark that had previously killed a person and injured others. Apparently when he landed on it, he broke it's neck, killing it on impact. Definitely my kind of man.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Fuck it.

Fuck this shit.

Fuck moving
Fuck packing shit
Fuck clothes that don't fit anymore
Fuck messy houses
Fuck boyfriends
Fuck girlfriends
Fuck ex's
Fuck friends
Fuck the people that say they care about you
Fuck the people that say that love you
Fuck the people you thought you could trust
Fuck Poughkeepsie
Fuck New York
Fuck drunks
Fuck retail
Fuck shitty holiday seasons
Fuck spending the holidays by yourself
Fuck growing up
Fuck living on your own
Fuck money
Fuck humanity
Fuck the motherfuckers that try to hold you down.
Fuck wanting to knock someone's teeth down their throat
Fuck people that bail on you
Fuck it all.

Just fuck it all.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010


13. Thoughts and opinions on Mean Girls

This movie has a devilish amount of truth to it, I suppose. How corruptable youth is, how highschool can be for some people. I never really related though. If anything, I related to Janice.

14. Do you have any siblings
I do. Kind of.
I have a half brother and I have a half sister. I also have a "brother"
We never lived together, so we aren't super close or anything. But aside from that, I get along with them rather well.

15.Favorite Junk Food
Gotta go with Funyuns on this. And, of course, icecream.

16. Favorite Disney Princess Movie
Disney princess? Not so sure. I really liked the Princess and the Frog???

17.Thoughts on Ugg boots.
A trend that should have died out a long, long time ago.

Picture unrelated.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Two Days

11. Your Top 3 Favorite Bands

1.The Weakerthans

I've been listening to these guys for years now. A lot of people don't recognize the name, either. Apparently they're pretty popular in Canada.
There music, I always find, is inspiring. Every time I listen to them, I feel like I learn something. The Weakerthans have a song for any moment of any day. For any feeling, any emotion and any situation.

2.Protest the Hero
Here is another band that I've been following for a few years now. Their album "Kezia" is my absolute favorite. I often choose them for long car rides. (They keep me awake!) They're one of the few heavy bands that I've discovered that actually have important lyrics. Important lyrics AND a concept album? From a metal band?! Yes, it is possible!

I don't really have a third, to be honest. I have my two favorites, then the rest that I really, really like are all pretty even!

12. Your Thoughts or Opinions on Harry Potter

Funny that you should ask, as we just spent Thanksgiving watching the first 6, then went to the movies the next day to see the 7th.
I grew up with Harry Potter (and Harry Potter grew up with me, actually). So, the entire series is very dear to me. Every book and every movie has been purchased or viewed on the first available day (except for this last one, actually, because I was traveling...) Basically, I freaking love the Harry Potter series.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Mumm Baby!

10. Talk about your pets or the pets you would like to have.

Mumm Ra is my cat-baby.
I love him dearly.
He is currently curled up next to me, sleeping.
Almost 10 pounds.
Hes getting so big!!

someday I would like to have a crow.

Monday, November 29, 2010

Raw Food Time?

Raw food time.
I gotta lose this weight.
Its showing more and more.

I Always Forget!

Five days to catch up.
'Lets make this quick.

5. 3 favorite colors

Purple- It looks good on me, it can be a nice dark color, without looking too foreboding.

Black- I just like it, I guess. It matches everything

Silver- Its not gold. Haha

6. Favorite season: Autumn.
Not hot at all, not too cold.
Jackets are freaking sweeeet!

7. How you came across "blogger", how your life has changed since.
I once googled the world "lumberbum" and it took my to someone's site. I really enjoyed reading it, so I started up my own.
I like my blog, it gives me somewhere to rant and ramble, instead of bothering people in real life about it.

8. Fitness guru or couch potato:
I want to work out, but never get the chance to.
I hate sitting around, but living in a little apartment in freezing cold NY doesn't really allow for much movement.

9. Favorite meme at the moment:
None, really. I haven't been interneting as much as I usually do, so Im a bit behind on the latest memes. My favorites though, as "a cat is fine too" and party cat.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Feel Free to Skip This One. The Other Two Are More Interesting

It's funny how the past sneaks up on you out of nowhere.
One minute, you think that everything you left behind is nothing but dust. Old map markers a few pages back. Then, suddenly it's in front of you again, whether you like it or not.
Its like something that was burned to ashes suddenly rematerialized, plain as day, as if it had never been engulfed by the flames you set to it.

But inevitable.

This past month and a half has been nothing but that feeling.
Things resurfacing. A cancerous relapse.
Everything that I thought I shed, crawling back over my fresh skin.

I've returned to square one.

As much as I hate to admit it, there hasn't been a day that I haven't cried for the past 20-some days. Frankly, I grow weary of it.

My heart is tired of hurting. The weight of it makes it seem like stones could float with ease in comparison.

It sucks that this blog is turning into more of a diary. Occassionally that happens, but that is not my intention. Hopefully it'll seen be back to the angry, yet interesting jots and tiddles that it used to be.

As of right now though, this might be the only place I have to turn.

See, I'm not looking for advice, I'm not looking for help and I'm not looking for opinions. There are plenty of people that are offering that. It's just simply not what I'm looking for.
At this point, I just need to get everything out. Something is telling me that I time will come where I won't be able to convey my feelins properly, but this will be here to do so. This is just a fallback, I guess.

As I started writing this post, my intention was actually to review a CD that I just purchased. Funny how things start to tie together. I suppose I had best get on that.

Until next time.

Louder Than God's Revolver and Twice as Shiny

(Aw, see? They're still cute as can be!)

For the past 4 years many of us have been anxiously awaiting the release of the new My Chemical Romance album. Let me tell you, I've been on the edge of my seat. The constant checking of their websites, the endless hours of research, the tears and sadness with each bit of bad news that seems to precede their latest endeavor.
Finally, Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys has been released.

This seems to be a reoccurring trend with me:

Eagerly, I unwrapped the plastic that clung so forcefully to the CD case. The troublesome sticky plastic adhesive strip sealed it shut, making it near impossible to free my prize from it's grasp.
Then, it was free.

I loaded it into the disk player in the car.
First track, so far so good. Second track, I'd heard it before. Third track, I turned it off.
Complete and total bullshit.
Rage and fury.

Okay, okay. Hold up!

Everyone is wondering what the hell is wrong with me, what I'm smoking, if I'm delusional, etc.

Hear me out.

Way back in the day, I was dating someone.

This someone just to happened to be one of the most psychotic, unhinged, maniacal bunny-boilers I have ever met in my life. God knows why I stuck around so long.
I just so happened to meet this person through a My Chemical Romance fansite. We hit it off right away (when they seemed normal), but then things got ridiculous.
We started up our own fansite, all was fine and dandy. A big part of our relationship actually centered around the band and our love for them.
Then shit got crazy.
Super crazy.
Like, cry under the bed, My Super Ex Girlfriend meets The Exorcist crazy.
We broke up, it was like running naked through hell whilst wrapped in razor-wire.
(Honestly, I would rather do that than deal with this person anymore)

And naturally, as if shit could get any weirder, I pop in this CD, listen to 2 songs, the 3rd song comes around and my ex's NAME was USED IN THE FUCKING SONG.


Of ALL bands and of ALL names, THESE TWO have to somehow mix together?
I still can't figure out how the hell that happened. They say "*name* won't you come back home" or something ridiculous like that.

All of my rage poured out.

It took me a few days to give it another try.
Now I just skip that song.

The rest of the CD is great. Yada-yada.

Basically, its like The Buggles meets the Chili Peppers meets Dr. Manhattan or something.
All whilst infused with a generous amount of Fallout 3-esque themes.
They kept all of their imagery from before, spiders, bullets, hearts, vampires, David Bowie.
So, yeah, they're still doing their thing.
It's no Black Parade, but you really can't even compare the two, because they sound like two different bands that sing with the same (effects/auto tuned?) voice.
Perhaps part of it is the fact that they're drummer is gone, so they have more of a keyboard focus than a drum focus. I do miss that and I was a fan of their drummer.

It's not bad, though, considering that many bands can't keep going after losing a member.

I haven't dug deep enough into it to really understand the concept yet and I haven't paid enough attention to the words to really grasp what's going on. So, perhaps I'll write more about them later on.

Wow. 4 Days Already? Oops!

I could have swore that just yesterday I posted my 30 Day Blog Challenge.
Time to catch up.

Day 2: Talk about your tattoos and piercings.

Easy enough!

My first piercings were, of course, my ears.
I was an infant, it wasn't my choice. I don't remember.
As I grew older, I wanted more. The holes had shifted a little, so now I just ignore them
Now I have 3 new holes in each ear. I've had them normal sized, I've had them gauged to all kinds of crazy ways. Unsuccessfully, I've pierced my nose and ears and other parts. None of it turned out as I hoped, so I just let them be.
Right after my 18th birthday I pierced my tongue. I've had all of those since.

Tattoos, though.
My first one was a hand-drawn honey bee. Not unlike the ones from Whinnie the Pooh. It is on my side, above my hip.

Ink, as many people know, is addicting.

From the bee it then turned to arm tattoos:
3/4 of my right arm is covered, from above my wrist up to my shoulder. All of them are old Sega Genesis games.
It starts with Zombies Ate My Neighbors, then goes to Battle Toads, then Earthworm Jim, then Ecco the Dolphin, then Sonic the Hedgehog. Some the main characters, some the side characters and villains. Today, for example, I got Evil the Cat from Earthworm Jim on my shoulder. Next month I'll be getting the cover from Golden Axe II on the back of my shoulder.
No, there are no real pictures of them online. I have a few pictures of the individual bits, but there are no pictures of its entirety. Soon, my friends, soon.

Day 3: Write About Your Favorite Television Program

I wish I could write about my favorite television program, but I actually don't have one.
In all honesty, I avoid watching TV if I can. I really like movies and games, but TV, I could do without.
Back in the day, Queer as Folk was one that was frequently played in my house. When I was younger I liked Invader Zim. As of right now? There really aren't any. Its a struggle to find something enjoyable.

Day 4: Write About Your Closets Friends

That is pretty hard to do at this point in my life.
Many of my friends, I don't talk to anymore. The ones that I do speak to, we don't have the "best friends" relationships.
This...actually really sucks.

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Down The Rabbit Hole

I wish I were falling somewhere half as interesting as Wonderland.

Another One Of These

I stole this from my friend's Tumblr.
And also I just need something to keep my mind off of my life right now.

So, Day 1.

My middle name is Elise.
When I was younger, I didn't really like it. The name was far too girly for my taste. To this day, it still surpasses any level of femininity that I could ever muster, but regardless, I have no qualms with the name.
As I got older, I began to appreciate it, mostly because of the fact that my parents got it from the song Für Elise, by Ludwig van Beethoven.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

You Don't Even Want To Know

I will start by apologizing for the negativity that is seeping from every crooked letter and every punctuation in this post.
These past few days may have been some of the worst days of my life.
What makes it even worse is the fact that I can't even write about it here due to potential legal issues.

The other day I was flown to Texas to testify in court.
First I had to drive to Philadelphia, which is no big deal, as this happens about once a month.
From Philadelphia I flew to Houston, Texas. No big deal, right? Wrong.
The flight was connecting, of course, so I could get to my actual destination. Unfortunately, though, that flight left 20 minutes after my first flight touched ground. God knows it could take 20 minutes just to get off of a plane. Naturally, my first flight was ten minutes late. Fantastic.
Finally I made it in and went to the gate, which turned out to be changed. The new terminal was "all the way across the airport", according to one of the not-so-accommodating staff members. So, off I ran, taking the train for the second time to get to the proper terminal. Did I get there? Yes. Did the employee tell me the right terminal? No. Of course, I had to hope back on the plane and finally made it to the proper gate.
Just in time for the plane to be leaving.

I missed my freaking flight.

So, after more frustration, my flight was switched and I had to fly to Dallas. Then from Dallas, to my destination.
It was a nightmare.
My feet hurt, my stomach was sick, I hadn't slept in 36 hours and I had to face what felt like a reoccurring nightmare.

We will shorten this whole, lengthy story by saying I was driven to the court house, testified then spent the night and the next day in a large hotel. The court case did not go at all as planned. If anything, it was the complete opposite of what we were hoping for.
In the hotel, the food was mediocre and I found fleas in my room. Luckily I got my room switched and got to watch cable for a while, so that was good.
The next day I was driven back to the airport, hoped on a tiny jet, flew back into Houston, then went back onto another plane to Philly. That flight was filled with screaming, shrieking, whining children and a lady that chomped on her gum as if she were a goat.

The whole situation was a horrible, horrible nightmare that still has my eyes watering when I think about it too hard.
Another few days in Philly to recover, then back to New York.

Honestly, I'm not even writing this post so people can read it, but more for my own well-being. it just sucks that I can't even write what I want to.

Recently I haven't been able to talk to Van much, not just because of not being home, but because of work schedules and just issues.
He has so many of his own problems that I can't help but feel like I am a complete and total burden to him more than anything else.

Not too long ago we got new that we were going to have to move out of our apartment. Van will be moving into his family's house, I will be moving into my friends' house.
Thanksgiving is going to be crappy, and Christmas is going to be even worse. I'm dreading every upcoming moment for the next 6 months.

There is just too much going on right now for me to handle and I don't know what to do.

I can't get a hold of my best friend, either, so I really feel like I have no one right now.

Sure, I have my parents, as I'm staying in their house, but as soon as I leave here and go back to New York, I'm going to be completely alone again.

I don't feel like writing anymore.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Ain't That a Kick in the Head?

This passed week has been mostly wonderful!

Isn't that a good thing?

It's been a while since there has been any updates here, and for that I apologize. This may be a lengthy one.

First things first:

Fallout New Vegas.

Has is been taking up a lot of my time?
The answer is "yes".

At this point I am at level...18? And well on my way. So here comes the "review", so to speak.

The beginning of the game may have been the biggest disappointment I have faced since Sonic the Hedgehog became 3D.
The storyline was god-awful, the startup of the game was slow, the area was boring and the new features were confusing.

Total play time before throwing down the controller: 45 minutes.
Total time spent bitching because the game sucked: 5 days.

Eventually I had some more spare time and I finally mustered up the patients to guts to pick it up again.
Same thing.
Total play time: An hour and 15 minutes.
Faith in Bethesda: Diminished.

"Oh, it gets better," they said.
"Keep playing!" They said.


"You can launch Ghouls into outer space!" They said.


Well... in that case...

Controller back in hand, I trudged onward through the Mojave wasteland, trying to make the best of things.

Total playtime: 32 hours and 15 minutes.

Ultimately, it redeemed itself, making it a more playable game. Less frustrating, too. Here is a quick run through of what is good and not so good.


The dialog. I was extremely impressed with the dialog, this time around.
In Fallout 3, you could walk around and another character would make a nasty, offhand remark about you. Though, as soon as you clicked on them to speak, they were cheery as can be.
Here, that changed that. When they're mean, they're mean. When they're nice, they're nice. It is refreshing. Other than that, the dialog options are great.

Creatures and people.
The new characters and creatures in the game are awesome! Robotic dogs, firebreathing geckos, Elvis impersonators. Its great. A lot less run-of-the-mill.

The companions you have follow you are swell. They also give you a lot of neat-o perks.
Let me tell you, Boone is just the bee's knees.

Instead of just having good or bad karma, you gain fame an infamy amongst the other colonizations and groups in the wasteland. This is really nice, actually, because instead of having EVERYONE shooting at you, you only have a few people. Though, the disguises and outfits don't work as well as I had hoped they would...


The storyline.
Perhaps Im just not far enough along yet, but I think that I like the other storyline a little bit better....

It takes a bit longer to get your house here, I feel, but the options are greater. The first house you get, there is little or no attachment to the tow you're in. No reason to stat, reall. Evertually you get a really badass one.

Perks: There are some good ones, but there are also a lot of the same ones.... its disappointing. On top of that, you only get to choose a perk every-other level, which confused and upset me in the beginning.

Weapon mods:
Cool in theory, but a little too complicated for my liking. Especially the ammo. It is too time consuming and the menu screens are too cluttered for my to bother taking my time on it.


This may be the reason that I permanently lay this game to rest. There are too many quest-breaking bugs. It stutters, freezes and stalls. People and items don't show up where they need to be, and we have has some file corruptions that set us back HOURS.

Ammo mods/Creation:
I hate this and try to avoid it at all cost. Too much of a pain in the ass for me.

Snow globes:
I miss the bobble heads! And they give you money, instead of skill points... Oh well...

Overall, its pretty cool, but it doesn't quite hold a candle to Fallout 3. After falling in love with those characters, it really sucks to have to start over again. The bugs in the game are excruciating and frustrating (along with the lengthly loading screens...)
I would recommend picking it up, for sure. But I may actually recommend that you wait until there is a patch out for it or you will just be wasting your time.

When not playing Fallout, I have been working overnights (hence the lack of updates.) Personally, I think it is awesome. Most of it was physical labor, which was a nice chance. Getting in to work at 9, then leaving at 9 in the morning was actually pretty sweet. (McDonald's bacon, egg and cheese bagels for dinner! YES!)
I didn't really like sleeping all day though. Didn't get to see Van very much either. But other than that, it was nice. A lot of hours and a lot of moving around. I dig.

Finally I caved and applied for college again. I just need to get my transcripts sent in. I'm going to be a High School English teacher. This is something I look forward to.

Right now all I can think about is food, so I'm going to go and perhaps play Fallout until Van wakes up. My sleeping schedule is all screwed up now, so I just woke up a little while ago and its 4 AM (I think? Daylight savings time has confused me a little bit, since the clock on my computer is already wrong?)

Off to scrounge up some Lucky Charms.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

What A D-Bag

First off, I have no idea what to write about. It seems like the topics for me to cover are dwindling.
So, if anyone has anything that they want to read about, feel free to let me know and I'll get to it.
Lets make this blog more "reader happy", if that makes sense.

Secondly, I just watched the movie Funny People, and I seriously think that it made me depressed. 2 hours of a sick comedian's life spiraling out of control? Great.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all about depressing shit. I rather enjoy watching fucked up movies about drugs and gangs and crap like that. Not if I expect it to be funny though.

Thirdly, I'm about to slaughter my neighbors. Not only were they pounding on the wall with a hammer today, but now they're stomping around like a herd of cattle upstairs. Its really not difficult to walk lightly.

And lastly:


*No, that is not me. My puke was blue and full of Funyuns.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

There Ain't No Rest For the Wicked

Sagging, tired eyes
What is this thing you speak of?
"Sleep" is what it's called?
I've lost count of how many days it has been since I've slept well. Going to bed at 6:30 am isn't cutting it. For some reason I keep tossing and turning.
Luckily enough, I've been able to keep myself busy.
So far I've nearly completed my Fallout 3 Laser Rifle prop for my Halloween costume. The rest of my outfit is ready to go. Same with Van's.
The other night I worked the midnight release for Fallout New Vegas. What a wonderful time!
Of course I left the store with my collector's edition copy, I haven't had a chance to play it though.
After leaving the midnight release a little later than 1 am, I drove a friend of mine home, then picked up my other friend, Jason, and we drove to Philly.
In the pouring rain.
At 2 am.
Several Full Throttles, a NOS, a Rockstar and a Venom later....
We got to my parents' house at 6 am, just as Dad was leaving for work.
Almost immediately we went to sleep, just to wake up in 4 hours then drive an hour into Center City.
There we waited at the Rock School of Dance to audition to work at DISNEY WORLD!
This was very exciting.
I figured, though, that we would just do some minor acting auditions and get an interview. I was sorely mistaken.
And sore in general.
Turns out we had to dance for approximately 3 hours. Almost non-stop. After being so exhausted (and sick from drinking all those poisons on an empty stomach that morning...), dancing was the LAST thing I needed to do. I was certain that I was going to faint.
The auditions were out at 5 pm. I felt confident and sweaty and ready to collapse.
With eyes drooping and heads nodding, we finally made our way home, ate dinner, then watched the extremely disappointing Scream Awards.
At 8 o'clock this morning, we woke up and made our way back to New York. Traffic was awful, due to ungodly amounts of construction.
I dropped Jason off at his house, then went to Planet New York and added on to my tattoo.
Now, I'm home, sitting on the couch, typing this with my eyes closed, ready to fall asleep. Maybe I'll make cookies for Van tonight, since I just got some chocolate chip cookie dough from Mom.
Or maybe I'll just lay on the floor until someone scoops me up with a giant spatula...

Friday, October 15, 2010

Today was a day of much-needed adventuring and business.
After sitting around the house for a week or so, it was nice to go out for a little.
Yeah, okay, I wandered around the mall for 6 hours, but it was better than sitting home alone doing nothing.
(Though...that could have been some valuable Fallout time...)

I found some parts for my Halloween costume, got some more tobacco for my hookah (which you can review on my other blog, if you click to my profile) and saw Jackass 3D.

Let me tell you, Jackass 3D was the best 11 dollars I have spent in a long time.
If you're into that kind of crap, I definitely recommend it. Plus, Johnny Knoxville is my "From-the-waist-up" celebrity crush. It gave me a much needed laugh, which I was thankful for.

Sometimes you just need to watch a guy get punched in the dick, you know?

Wednesday, October 13, 2010


Yesterday I really needed someone to talk to.
For the passed week or so, I've been having trouble sleeping. Going to bed at 4 or 5 in the morning because I just couldn't fall asleep, no matter how hard I tried.
Last night, I thought for sure that I would be able to sleep. We went to bed at 11 or so. An hour later, I was still tossing and turning. I couldn't stop thinking about Victoria.
To those of you who don't know about Victoria, she's a good friend of mine. We were best friends in 4th-5th grade. Then we started going to different schools, etc.
We were really tight.

She died about 6 months ago, back in May. I don't know who all reads, this, so I really don't want to get into details about what happened.
Lets just say it was extremely sudden, extremely unexpected, and extremely unintentional.
We were out of the country, when it happened, so I wasn't able to attend her funeral. I did, though, get to go to her 40 Day Memorial, which gave some closure, but not nearly enough.
For a while, I had been doing alright, more or less coming to terms with things.
Just every once in a while it hits really hard. Yesterday was just one of those nights.
Over and over again, I kept seeing my mom walk into my room and tell me that she had died.
It was unbelievable.
A few other things about the event kept circulating through my mind, I wish I could type them out, but again, I don't know who all reads this, so it's not appropriate.

Luckily a good friend of mine, Chris, is always just a phone call away. He was best friends with Victoria, too, so we talked about it a little bit.
That made me feel better.
It'll never get easier, though, I don't think.
You can face the realization, of course, but it just never gets easier.

I Am Not A Violent Person

I just have no problem with ripping someone's arm off then beating them to death with it.

Not really, though.
I realize, after going back and reading these, that I seem really, really mean. Or bitchy. Or hateful.
This is partially true, I will admit.
Part of this I blame on working kitchen jobs, part of this I blame on working retail jobs.
My sense of humor comes in to play. I suppose one could say that I have a "violent" sense of humor.
But I don't mean it, for the most part.

I'm nice, I promise.

Or maybe I'm just a MINOTAAAAAUUUURRR!

Bet you weren't expecting that, huh?!

Lastly, I'd like to say that I freakin love Snoop.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

It is 2:07...

And I cannot decide if I want to go to sleep or play Left4Dead2 some more today...

Did I mention that I made a MINOTAUR for D&D?


I love them.


okay, one more time:


Saturday, October 9, 2010

As If I Couldn't Get Any More Freaked Out...

There are bedbugs at the mall I work at.

Though, I think they got rid of them already...

I'm about ready to shave my head and douse myself in a bleach/kerosene mixture.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010


I am so paranoid.
This is terrible.

Recently, I had fleas in my house. Luckily enough, I killed them all, and will be respraying next week.

On top of that, the media keeps fueling our minds with the threat of bedbugs.

All of this has led me to being extremely itch all the time.
I feel like I have things crawling all over me. It is driving me crazy!!!

Monday, October 4, 2010

Put That In Your Pipe And Smoke It...

For any of you hookah smokers out there, I've started a blog on shisha reviews.
Feel free to take a look and comment with your opinions and experiences.


Put That In Your Pipe And Smoke It!

I promise I'm not as mean in this one.

As Promised

To any of you who haven't read my reviews before,
You will quickly learn that I specialize in tearing things apart.
I know, I know, this is unfair, but that is just how it is.
Unfortunately, the bad almost always outweighs the good.

If there is a movie where a basket of kittens get violently and graphically tortured, no one is going to give a shit if the protagonist finally gets with the love interest.

Violently and graphically tortured kittens outweigh a kiss.

The bad outweighs the good.

(I am in no way, shape, or form suggesting that a basket of kittens get violently and graphically tortured in The Social Network, so don't get your hopes up, sociopaths.)

Now, the first step to recovery is admitting that you have a problem.

That is exactly what I'm doing here: admitting that I violently and graphically torture movies in my reviews.
So, I will try my hardest not to be to brutal with this one.

(Insert shitty "Windows Movie Maker" transition here)

The Social Network.

Let me start by telling you that I only had minimal knowledge of what this movie was about before I went to see it.
So little, actually, that about 40 minutes into the movie, I noticed what the main character's name was, leaned over to my friend, and said "Wait...Mark Zuckerburg? Isn't that the guy who made Facebook?"

No shit, Sherlock, go back to the kiddie table.

I though that this movie was a fictional tale about social networking, fabricated for the entertainment of the Internet-saturated youth of today.
Oh, was I wrong.

It turns out that this movie was the history of Facebook.



Why would ANYONE be interest in seeing that?

Had I known that, I probably would have waited to rent it, accidentally kicked it under the couch, forgotten about it for weeks, and had a movie-ticket's worth of late fees by the time I finally found it.

Luckily though, it wasn't wretched.

So, allow me to paint a picture for you;

The film starts out with our hero(???), and his girlfriend at a bar, babbling almost incoherently back and forth in a tedious, somewhat indistinguishable monotonous exchange that made me pray and pray that the entire movie wasn't going to be like this.

Turns out it was simply a way to show what a DICK our main character is.

Though, our dickish main character's dialog was kept up in the same excruciating fashion throughout the entire movie. (I will admit that it was funny, if you could keep up.)

The whole middle of the movie was a back-and-forth, dizzying switch between camera angles and parts of the story, trying to explain multiple lawsuits. Not only were they explaining lawsuits, they were explaining them backwards. Kind of. It wasn't bad though, just took a little getting used to.

One thing I couldn't get used to was the GOD DAMN FILTERS that they used.

I felt like I was watching the first 10 seconds of an Asthma medication commercial throughout the ENTIRE MOVIE. And when it wasn't an Asthma medication commercial, it had the feel of a modernized Western. Maybe if Walker Texas Ranger banged Juno McGuff.
Something like that.
Horrible filters. Horrible filters that were difficult to see past (ba'dum-tss!)

That was perhaps my biggest complaint about the movie.

I had one more problem, though. Not from my own personal experience, but I feel like it could have easily been an issue, especially for either the older generations or the younger generations.

If you understood a large amount about computers, then this movie would be easy for you to follow.
If you understand a lot about the law, it would be even easier.
And if you understand a bit about business, then it would be easier yet.

If you don't know much about any of the previously stated; good luck. You're gonna need it.

The film is about Harvard students.
They talk and act like...well...Harvard students.

So, if you're an older person that only operates the computer to check your email when you remember or to play Solitaire because the TV is out, then this movie will be miserable for you to watch. Stay home and open up that DVD your grand kids got your for Christmas that you haven't touched yet.

If you're twelve years old and have no idea how life works yet, go watch the Guardians of Gahoole or whatever the hell it is, because you're not going to understand it and you're going to sit in the theater texting your BFF the whole time. Then I'm going to reach over and break your phone in half then stuff it in your cherry slushy. (Do I smell a euphemism?!)

Now, as I say in almost every blog of mine:

Moving right along.

The acting was pretty on-par (with a few awkward exceptions,), the story, in the end, was interesting enough, and the cinematography was...acceptable. The oh-so-anticipated musical score, though, was god-awful.

Have you ever seen "Forgetting Sarah Marshall"?

At one point in that movie, the main character talks about his job as a composer. He explains that he doesn't compose music, really, but just dark and ominous tones.

It felt like they hired him for this movie.

Dark and ominous tones.



That's pretty much what we had going on here.

But let's try to think positively.

One of the strongest points of the movie, was character development, but I feel like that's nothing special since it was based on REAL PEOPLE. There were no "characters" to "develop".
But over all, the characters were interesting.
While watching it, I felt for them.
When one got fucked over, I was a little pissed. When something good happened, it made me happy.
They weren't just empty shells, so that was good.
Everything about it was very realistic (no shit...) From the emotions, to the consequences of the character's actions, to the way they spoke, to the way they dressed. Even the events of the movie were realistic, so that was very uplifting. My time wasn't totally wasted.
Well, not all of it.
About....eh.... an hour and fifty minutes of it.
A story that could have easily been told in ten minutes was drug out to about two hours.

It was like listening to your drunken uncle at thanksgiving.

You know, the one you try to avoid being alone with because he's going to hold you hostage and tell you his life story for the 6th time?
Kind of like that.

The movie was just a bit long.
(and then ended really abruptly, so you had no idea when it was finally going to be over.)

So, i the end, I'd say "sure, go see it".
Its worth seeing once. I wouldn't buy it, I wouldn't see it again in the theater unless someone else was paying for my ticket and begged me to go.
Maybe I'll rent it once.
Its worth a one time see, so may as well.
We all know that if you don't, you're just going to sit home and F5 your News Feed for two hours anyway.

3/5 stars.

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Forget "Sexy", is JT Going to Bring Myspace Back?

Today I am going to see The Social Network
(I know, I know, I'm so behind! It's been out for a whole two days already!)

So I will be back to bitch and rant about it.

(That's actually pretty unlikely, as it got a 97% from Rotten Tomatos.)

I guess we will find out.

Then you all can read yet ANOTHER review.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

I Gotta Say...

The way to a girl's heart...
if definitely a 12 piece bucket of extra crispy from KFC.

Just incase there are any lonely guys out there lookin to impress a lady.

Fuck chocolates,
chicks want the Colonel.

Friday, October 1, 2010


Halloween is coming up.
Oh we're all so excited.

I'm in the process of trying to find a good costume.
Originally, I was thinking of being Jessica Rabbit, but we're having problems finding a good Roger Rabbit costume for Van.
Maybe I'll be a ghoul, from Fallout, or perhaps a Vault 101 resident.

But what I'm wearing is not the point of this blog.

I'm wondering why the hell some of these horrible costumes are made!
At this point in time, female costumes go something like this:

Is it an animal, an occupation, or a fairy-tale character?
Okay, use only 2 years of fabric for the costume, add leg warmers and shitty plastic boning in the front.

"Wow! That's a great outfit! What a great idea, to be a hooker for halloween!"
"I'm not a hooker! I'm a lady bug!!! LOL!"
"Oh, I thought those spots were from your herpes! LOL!"


"Who are you this year?"
"Poccahantas! DUH!"
"Oh, Im sorry...I thought you were the girlfriend of one of the Village People..."

I remember, when I was a kid, my mom and grandmother made all of my costumes.

To this day, I don't think I've ever had a pre-packaged, store bought, cheap, skanky piece of shit.

I'm pretty okay with that, too.

Its really not that difficult to put together a good costume without looking like a complete ho.

What the hell, bro... what the hell...

Monday, September 27, 2010

The Final Day

Day 30- Who are you?

A picker, a grinner, a lover, a sinner

no that's not right...

a bitch, a lover, a child a mother..

no... thats not right either...

When I know, you will know.

Friday, September 24, 2010

Na Na Na!

Day 29- In this past month, what have you learned

I have learned:

The importance of keeping your professional life and personal life separate,
Everyone thinks that they are right.
I'm awesome at Fallout 3.

The new My Chemical Romance song is phenominal!

Does that count??

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Ch-ch-ch-ch Changes

Day 28- A picture of you last year and now, how have you changed since then?

Uh. Lets see,

Gained 15-20 pounds.

Sleeve tattoo

Long hair.

Thats about it.

Kinda sucks.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Ling Ling, my ass!

As humans, many of us work hard to keep our environment clean, healthy and alive.
We have National Parks, reservations, endangered wildlife funds and various research projects all to make sure that our planet will last forever.

At a very young age, we are told that we should respect the environment. You know, "don't litter", "conserve water" and of course "recycle".

We are also told that every being on the planet has its own special use. Every organism plays its own unique role in the environment and that all of it should be protected and saved.

Well I beg to differ, because I have found an exception:

Fucking pandas.
Those smarmy, self righteous bastards.
Of all creatures on this earth, pandas are the ones that serve no use to the ecosystem.
They do not produce anything useful (except for shit, which can apparently be made into souvenirs...), they don't serve as prey for anything and they don't keep any kind of population in check.
Bamboo population? Yeah right. That shit grows faster than mold on a week old burrito. Pandas or not bamboo is going to flourish. There is so much bamboo and so few pandas that they don't even count.
Pandas. Serve. No. Use.
On top of being useless, they're little bitches, too.
Everyone thinks they're so cute and cuddly,
Do you not realize this?
There is no difference between


They're both bears, they're both huge and they both want to tear your limbs off.
Just because they look like fat mimes doesn't mean they're friendly. Or in an invisible box.
Below is a video of a lucky man.

Long story short; fuck pandas.

Skip. Not exciting.

Day 24- A letter to your parents

Day 25- What I would find in your bag

Cough drops, pay stubs, pepper spray, a ton of keys, phone, ipod, perhaps food,
change, my wallet, pills, lady products...
All kinds of things.

Day 26- What you think about your friends
Well now,
that really depends on the friends, I'd say...
Considering I rarely see most of my friends, I can't really make much of a judgement on that.
I see my work friends a lot.
And the people that I am actually friends with, I really like.

Friends outside of work really depends.

I have my Philly friends that I love but never see.

I have my New York friends that I am still getting used to.

My Maryland friends are pretty much non-existant anymore since its been 10 years since I've seen any of them.

Then I have other ones, from many places.

So...it...varies, I guess...

Day 27- Why are you doing this 30 day challenge?

Mostly so my blog doesn't die, so I have something to write about and something to do. Despite the fact that I neglect it....

This was a really boring post.

I am sorry.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Day 23- Something you crave for a lot

And chinese food.
And chili dogs.

lots of cravings.
I put pregnant women to shame.


Day 22- What makes you different from everyone else?

Answer: Nothing.

Everyone is the same.
Programmed the same.
We all think basically the same way.
As much as we would like to tell ourselves
that we are all different,
sadly, we are not.

We are all made out of the same things
We all live, we all breathe, we all die.
I am just like you, in many ways
and you are just like me.

Maybe the one thing that makes me different
is that I actually understand this.

Slackin 21

Day 21- A picture of something that makes you happy

Believe it or not: cleanliness.
It seems very simple.
And cleaning is something that I rarely do.
I will no lie, my house is always a mess.
And I hate it.
But when it is clean, it is a wonderufl feeling.
My mind is so much more at ease.

Monday, September 13, 2010


Day 20- Someone you see yourself marrying/being with in the future

This guy.
This guy right here.
He is the Mario to my Peach,
The Link to my Zelda.
My Knight In Shining Armor,
My retard in tin foil
My Prince Charming.
I love him very much.
See how good he is, taking my little cat for a walk in the snow?

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Hear Ye, Hear ye!

Yesterday was a wonderful day.

Van and I spend the afternoon at the New York Renaissance Faire.

It was a LOT of fun!

Getting there was a horrible hastle. Aside from not being able to properly read a GPS, the god-awful parking situation, and the less-than-accomodating staff, everything was very well put together.

It took us at least 30 minutes to figure out where to go. Turns out that you had to take a bus from the parking lot, to the fair. Then wander around there for 20 minutes while the staff stared blankly at you, desprite your confusion. Only to find out that you have to cross the street to get to it. Simple enough, right?

But, after going through all of that, it was wonderful.

So many colors and characters. Booths and tends and stalls of all kinds of interesting things.

Delicious food and pretty clothing.

V got me some lovely flowers and a turkey leg. Everyone knows that is the way to a girl's heart.

Plants and meat.

One of the coolest things we did, was see the birds of prey show. Enormous creatures, some of them. Owls and condors and hawks and vultures. It was really very cool.

All in all it was really cool. We're definitely going back next year.

The end.


Day 17- Someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why

Specifically, I'm not sure.
But I think I would like to switch lives with someone that lives in India.
Their culture is so extremely different than ours, that I think it would be very difficult to live over there for an extended period of time. But for a day, just for the experience, that would be great.

Day 18- Plans/dreams/goals you have
Plans, dreams, goals?
As of right now, its just to get in shape.
I'm really tired of looking the way I do.
Also, to find a better job.

Day 19- Nicknames you have; why do you have them

I've got an ungodly amount of nicknames.

First and foremost is Red.
I think that one kind of speaks for itself.

Skeletor was another, because I used to be really skinny.

Tupac, because of all of my tattoos (Miami Ink was another one)

I know there are a lot more, but I can't remember them at the moment.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Day 14, 15 and 16. Along with some other things.

Day 14- A picture of you and your family.
This is my family and I on our cruise to the Bahamas.
It was quite a fun time.
Also the first vacation we had been on together in 19 years, I believe.

Day 15- Put your iPod on shuffle: First 10 songs that play.
This is so something that you are not going to want to sit through...
Alright, here goes nothing:

1. Creep (Acoustic) - Radiohead
(Unfortunately this version is edited.)

2. Baby, I Got Your Money (Cover) - Say Anything

(This cracks me up)

3.Damn You Looks Good And I'm Drunk (Scandalous) - Cobra Starship

(And this is definitely the first time I've ever heard this song.)

4. Whole Day Off (Live) - Oingo Boingo

(If you didn't know, this is Danny Elfman's band.)

5. We Are The Gothic Archies - Gothic Archies

(Gothic Archies singer is also in a band called The Magnetic Fields. Some of their music can be found in the TV show Queer as Folk. They also did the soundtrack for one of my favorite movies: Pieces of April.

6. Screaming at the Wailing Wall - Flogging Molly

(Flogging Molly. Not a whole lot to say here. Just good ol' Flogging Molly. Though, I was listening to them yesterday, so it is kind of funny that they turned up here.)

7.Group Sex - Cirlce Jerks

(Never listened to this song, either, to be honest. Well, not that I remember, at least.)

8. The Age of Pamparius - Turbonegro

(Another one that I've never listened to before. As you can see, my ipod doesn't get much use anymore...)

9. Horror Beach - Horrorpops

(These guys are wonderful live. I highly recommend seeing them, if you ever get the chance.)

10. Dance in the Sand - Shwayze

(Shwayze is so chill....)

Day 16- Another picture of yourself



Day 13- A letter to someone who has hurt you recently

Dear Friend,

I am writing because I am concerned.

Speaking honestly, I know you must feel lost. Lost, confused, upset, broken and most of all, out of control.

Do you realize that you feel like this, or do you think what you are doing is normal for everyone?

I don't know which would be worse, to tell you the truth.

Part of the reason I am writing this, is to express my concern for you. The other reason though, is to let you know that you are hurting me as much as you are hurting yourself.

I miss the old you.

Regardless of the fact that change is inevitable, you don't have to spiral downward.

Change can be a good thing, you know.

Not matter what, we are going to grow. No matter what, we will all transform into a more defined "us".

Please make sure that you are changing for the better.

As of right now, it seems as though you are doing the exact opposite.

You let other people ruin you as much as you ruin yourself.

I don't know if you just feel like being defiant, or if you are just oblivious to the fact that you are slowly falling into self destruction.

The fact that you keep me at arm's length now doesn't help.

Maybe if you would just spill your problems out instead of trying to cover them up with bad habits, things would be going a lot better.

Stop doing such detrimental things,
if not for your sake,
then at least for mine.


Sunday, September 5, 2010


Day 12- How you found out about Blogger and why you made one

This is an interesting story.
Not really interesting, but I think so.

For some reason, ages ago, I wanted to see if the world "Lumberbum" would come up on Google. Not really sure why.
I believe, I actually used the website called Blackle to look it up.

Well, it came up in a blog called Attack with Decay. Anyway, I started reading his stuff and really enjoyed it.
Since then, I've started blogging.

Saturday, September 4, 2010

200th Post! (Day10/Day11, too!)


200th post today.

Ive had this blog for...2 years now, I think?
Something like that.

Unfortunately I've nothing to celebrate this 200th post with, other than the fact that I'm eating guacamole.

Can I just mention that avocados have 1/4 of the calories of butter?
Also 1/4 of the fat!
They also have 0 choleserol and 0 sodium!

So, next time you go to spread some butter or toss a slice of cheese on your sandwhich, stop and slice up some delicious avocado instead, or spread some guac on the bread.

I also missed Day 10 yesterday. So I will encoorperate that into this post.

Day 10- Songs you listen to when you are Happy, Sad, Bored, Hyped, Mad

Happy- Anything, usually. Often some kind of techno.
Sad- Regina Spektor, Sufjan Stevens.
Bored- I look for new music!!
Hyped- Protest the Hero! RAAAH!
Mad- I don't listen to music when I'm mad, for the most part. I throw things instead.

See? Wasn't that exciting??

And, for day 11.

Day 11- Post another picture of you and your friends
See above.

That would be my best friend Jess and I.
Long story short.
We started a fake band.
Wrote some hilarious songs.
Ran from the police.
Spring break.

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Day 9. Also, 90210

First off, today is 9-02-10
Great, right?

Day 09- Something you’re proud of in the past few days

Proud of?
Nothing. Nothing really?
I can think of a lot of things that I've done
that I am indeed proud of.
But not within the
last few days.

Been sick, you know?

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Day 8.

Day 08- Short term goals for this month and why

To tone up a bit, for sure.
Though that probably won't happen.

With halloween only 2 (ish) months away, I never know who or what I will dress as.
So, it is time to lose some weight (10-15, I'm thinkin) and tone up.

We will see what happens.!

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Day 7

Day 07- A picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you

That is really difficult to do.

As I don't feel like I have been impacted by anyone.

Usually, I don't care very much what people think, so people don't really impact me.

I hardly motivate myself, so, "myself" is not an option.

Usually, I do things with other people's interest in mind, but no one specifically.

My family has had an impact on me, but not to the biggest impact, I feel

and my friends are always changing, so their impact is little to nothing.

This is a difficult question.

And I do no have a picture for it.

So instead I shall post

this pickle man.

Monday, August 30, 2010

Day 6 (Plus some more fun things.)

Day06- Favorite super hero and why
Here we go. This is a good one.

I've always had trouble deciding who my favorite super hero is.
And at the moment it is a cross between 2...or maybe three...

First of I would like to mention Nightcrawler.
(In case you didn't know, he is from X-Men... if you don't know that...I'm not sure why you're reading my blog... but I digress...)

Nightcrawler always interested me, mainly because of his appearance and his abilities. They're pretty cool and his abilities are quite subtle for the most part. The more I learned of him, the more I enjoyed the actual personality of the character, then finally I learned of his history.

He's a cool character that just kind of minds his own business, had a rough life, but has learned to deal with it. (Though this seems to be a trend in most super heroes, to be honest)

My favorite thing about the X-Men though, is how the majority of them were simply born with their abilities. (Granted, some of them mutated themselves in one way or another...)
They weren't bitten by anything strange, injected with a serum, blasted with radiation.
They actually HAVE powers and generally don't have to wear special suits to use them.
They're just... born like that. And people either love them or hate them for it.
Even though they're probably the least human looking out of all of the heroes, I still find that they are the most human in the end.

The other two heroes I will mention are Hellboy and Abe.
I like Hellboy's personality. He's very stubborn, a bit harsh, and tries to be a badass.


He loves cats and candy.
Cats. and. candy.
(and Tecate, but...that's a different story...)

Somehow...I can relate...

And Abe. Abe is just phenomenal. One of the least physical characters I've ever seen (Professor X not included...)
But he's very smart, he's kind and he's shy. The exact opposite of Hellboy, but he is equally, if not more like-able. Trapped in his tank or in a funny suit, kind of falling by the wayside of the world. I just like Abe.

That's all.

(Ps. Cheetara)

And moving on.

A while ago I wrote a blog all about ICE CREAM!

Well, here's another one to add to my list.

The Inside Scoop, Hyde Park, Ny

The Inside Scoop is a near-by ice cream store that we had never visited before, despite the fact that we drive by is almost every day.
Little did we know that not only was it homemade ice cream, but it was also...really really good homemade ice cream...

Service: 9/10
Definitely. The employees were very, very friendly and enthusiastic (but not in the Cold Stone "we'regonnasingforyouandbealittlebitobnoxioussoyouwillgiveustips" kind of way.)
They made nice conversation, gave us a menu and let us try the flavors that we thought were interesting.

Hands down the best Cotton Candy ice cream I've ever had. I was extremely impressed, especially with the texture.
Their Cake Batter didn't beat the Island Creamery's, though.
But, they had a flavor called "Sponge Bob" and it was really good!

Originality: 8/10. It had a playground outside, the inside looked almost like an arcade/party store without the games and it was very colorful.

We both got two huge scoops of ice cream for a little over 7 dollars. I approve.

Despite not feeling well, we both enjoyed our ice cream and even had enough to take home and eat later!
It was wonderful

Total: 8.6