Tuesday, June 30, 2009

AAAAARRRRTEEEEEEEEEEEX!!

The empty hot chocolate mug is taunting me.
For some reason I have always been one to drink hot chocolate when it is really warm out and get cravings for ice cream in the winter. Never made a whole lot of sense.

Last update was the 20th, I see, quite a while ago that was!
Van took off of work for a week, so I felt no need to spend my time typing on a blog while he was here! my work starts tomorrow and in all honesty I do not look forward to this. The good news is I have to be there at 6, meaning I have to leave the house at 5 instead of at 4 like I had thought I would. Never is there a reason to complain about another hour of sleep.

yesterday we watch The Never Ending Story 2. Also known as "A Sad Attempt At Almost Trying To Make A Sequel But Failing Miserably"

I really don't think the same people even made it. The only actor that was the same, was the man that owned the book store. Even Falkor looked different and all of the character's voices were different people. It is quite evident that they did not even try.
We all know that the first movie consisted primarily of people screaming each other's names and that is about it, but of course it is a kid's movie from the 80's so one really couldn't ask much more than that.
Strange news though: there is rumor of a remake. This is indeed exciting.
Van and I decided that it will just be Alan Rickman as Falkor, in a dog suit, giving Shia LaBouf a piggy-back ride through the land of Fantasia, which I have decided is just a parking lot behind a Walmart with the streetlamps adorned with crepe-paper birthday streamers. The Nothing will be played by Johnny Depp and The Emptiness will be Helena Bonham Carter. Danny DiVito will be Morla, the giant turtle.
Sick. Sicksicksick.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Raise Your Hand If You've Ever

stuck your finger in your cat's mouth while it was yawning.

Friday, June 19, 2009

No Need To Read This One

Words cannot express the amount of sour that my mood is.
You may disregard that horribly constructed sentence.
The lack of happiness I am feeling at this moment is incredibly overwhelming, and because of this I am confused.
My bad day did nothing but get exponentially worse and now here I am sitting on a smelly couch in my living room with no desire to go to bed because I can't stop crying.
I would really like to bake some stupid cookies, but Stop N Shop and closed and I don't have baking soda or baking powder. Fuck this shit.
Goodnight. I wish I could vent.

Oven Mit Shark

Is an oven mit.


Thursday, June 18, 2009

Star Blog.

There is a tremendous amount of constant rain as of now and I cannot help but think "I do not exist" thanks to The Messes of Me by mewithoutYou. A good song, for those of you who do not know. Today will be one of those lonely days, because I do not particularly want to be driving around in this weather.

Now I would like to talk about one of my most hated companies: Starbucks.
Anyone who knows me knows that I do hate Starbucks, but also that I drink the shit when I have the money to. It really is quite a shame and I wish it didn't have to be that way. I have gone on many quests and searches to find a cheap, local alternative for the place, but every local alternative turns out to be even more expensive. But then again, when I go and get something stupid like a "Vanilla Bean Frappuchino" I look at it and wonder why I didn't just go get a vanilla milkshake from McDonalds for $1.58. I really don't know.
But, moving right along, Starbucks has unleashed a series of mutant possessed zombie coffee grinders. Yes.

The Starbucks Barista Blade Grinders

Yes, that would be it. You can see, clearly, that is is obviously of some demonic decent. Also the fact that they tend to turn on by themselves and refuse to shut off, sometimes when people are cleaning them. Someone get the Ouija board, these things have got something to say! Perhaps they require a blood sacrifice.
Apparently most Starbucks customers do not know how to properly handle appliance possession, so Starbucks has recalled 530,000 of them. Silly, silly people.




And speaking of silly people, lets touch on the story of 56 Star girl.


Some 18 year old girl in Belgium went to get her face tattooed (Because THAT was a good idea in the first place....) and ended up with 56 stars tattooed on the side of her face. The artist said that she had told him 56, the girls claims to have fallen asleep during the tattooing.


From first hand experience, I would NOT fall asleep while getting a tattoo, ESPECIALLY one on my face. Also, why would the artist continue tattooing her when she was asleep if she only asked for 3? For sure he knew that he would get sued, and the only plus side to her have 56 stars is that he would be able to charge more, but when you get a tattoo, you pay half of the amount before you even go to your appointment, so I definitely call bullshit on this girl.


The artist said that she looked in the mirror several times while it was being done and said that she liked it, and that everything was fine until her father showed up. Now she is suing the tattoo company and getting most of them removed. Way to go.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Guess Who Won't Be Sleeping Tonight???

To anyone that doesn't know, if there is any one thing that I am absolutely terrified of, it's sharks. I am terrified of sharks and I would just as soon blow of my head with a shotgun than set foot in an ocean.
Due to a recent dream that I had, my mother felt the need to send me a facebook page called "Not being eaten by sharks"
I joined. Unfortunately there were pictures


You may click the picture to go to the website of the photographer.

And I hope to GOD that this is photoshopped. It definitely made me pee myself.



*edit
the second picture is indeed photoshopped.
Lucky, lucky bastards.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Harpo Productions

Due to someone missreading something I had written on facebook ("I am currently making fudge and listening to opera"), I came to wondering"If Oprah Winfrey recorded an album and was giving a record deal, how many people would buy it?"
The breakdown of buyers would have quite an interesting breakdown, imaginably.

I believe it would consist mainly of stay-at-home moms and 4-chan-ers.
But the 4 chan-ers would probably just download it anyway.


Please think about this for a few.
Grazi.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

I Sense There's Something In The Wind

To whom it may concern:
I hope my constant posting keeps you entertained in some way shape or form, on an almost-daily basis.
Regards, Skellyton

I need to bake something. A cake, most likely, but I do not have the funds nor the material to do so. At some point, I will think of something to bake. Until then, I shall twitch like a junkie going through withdrawal. Perhaps it isn't that bad, but I really would like something interesting and productive to do. I can only play so much Soul Calibur and do so much cleaning before I lose my mind. Today might be a good day to venture down to the little pond that is behind my apartment complex. Birds and other little creatures live there, but it is overcast today, so I don't know if they would be out or not. I've already had a handful of seeds thrown on me today. Ah well.

Currently I sit here, wrapped like an ancient mummy in heat-wrap bandages, snacking on a bottle of tylenol. Thankfully everything is doing better. Should be perfectly fine by tomorrow. Yay!

Now it seems to be time to find something to eat and perhaps sleep more to get rid of this silly headache. I honestly feel like a ragdoll somethings, I must say!

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Oooowwwww.

I have been playing Soul Calibur for so long that my television has stopped reminding me what time it is....
god damn fucked up neck.
Time for a nap soon, then time to pop MORE aspirin.
blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

I Will Treat You Well

Out of all the people I subscribe to, I rarely have anything to read!!!!
Bummer!
I suppose most people don't have quite as much free time as I do or something. Ah well.
Off to drown myself in aspirin and Gatorade, then perhaps find something to eat!

Monday, June 8, 2009

I''m so punk I sit around on FACEBOOOOK!!!!!!

Made it back home safely. Everything is pretty good for the most part.
Iim currently sitting on my couch drinking a ton of yellow gatorade trying to get rid of a headache that has been hanging around since yesterday. Theres somethiing about this area and allergies, it seems like everyone has them.
I think we're starting a new RP, but I don't understand it yet.
Perhaps Ill think of something to do today until Van gets home.
I had a dream about the grocery store. It wasn't a very good one, but a person I used to know showed up in it. Very strange. Grocery store dreams are always very vivid to me.
Anyhow, I'm going to stop typing now, not because I have something better to do, but because I don't have anything else interesting to say!

Saturday, June 6, 2009

D:

I miss my Vannerpuss!!!!!!!!!

Going home tomorrow morning. Got a gigantic bag of grapefruits and 9 mangoes! Woohoo! Along with some chicken and some eggs and some cheese and some veggies! Hooray for balanced meals!

Friday, June 5, 2009

Mullet With Headlights




Black and purple???

What The Effing Crap, That Angel Guy Just Felt Me Up...

REWIND.

I sat in my bed with my laptop, then went downstairs into the kitchen, only to go into the garage and into the car. From the car to Costco, where I left the line I was standing in for 15 minutes for a chicken bake. There were at least 5 little whirling dervishes running around as their parents told them to stop running, take things out of their mouths and keep their hands to themselves. I got in line for the chicken bake. My mother and I walked around Costco for and hour, picking up random things for me to take to the apartment. It was almost dinner time, so there were a lot of people. We exited the car. We drove from Homegoods to Costco. In Homegoods we found nothing that we needed. The movie got out at almost 5 oclock. It was a very good one. We stood in line at the movie theater for 5 minutes or so to see UP at 3:20. My favorite manager does not work there any more. We dropped my dad off at home. My salad was far too spicy. My parents and I went to Dominic's to get things too eat. From the house to the car. I was in my room on my laptop looking for upright basses. I filled out a questionnaire for the hospital I was at. I set my bag on the ground after I got in the house after the 4 hour car ride. We loaded the car with everything. Breakfast was great, my grandmother made thin pancakes. I woke up, didn't sleep to well. I was sleeping.

Love Demon, I Am.

Currently I am on a quest to find a perfect upright bass. Unfortunately I do not have the kind of money that I would need to purchase one, so I will be waiting on incredibly long time. For a while now I have wanted to play rockabilly style bass, but this is kind of out of reach considering that there are very few people that hold this similar interest. And honestly, what good is just a bassist? regardless, I have found the bass that I want, I am not sure of the price. Though I did look on the website, and the basic that I want is approximately 890 dollars. Perhaps a it more due to the paint job.






Delicious.


Though I doubt many readers here are interested in finding an upright bass, the website is here, just in case sad, upright bassists has stumbled upon my site.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Sticky Wicket

I am currently writing from my grandmother's house in Virginia. We just came back from my cousin's graduation and party. It was generally pretty nice.
It has been a very long day with a lot of driving. More driving tomorrow. Back to Philadelphia, perhaps going to go see a movie with my mother. On Saturday I will go to my friend Robby's graduation party, then go back home on Sunday. I could really got for some sleep so I think I will go within the next few minutes.
Actually, no, I'm going to go to bed now. I apologize for how bland this post was.






Whirling dervish.



Hopefully that made it less bland.

Also, I just did the spell check, and there were no misspellings found. Go me.
And I still think you need to get a facebook, Vanny.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Anorexia Verbosa

Click to embiggen

And this is HILARIOUS.

The Ultimate Nightbane

Hey, V, check this one out:

1. Cat head:
-Have the head of a cat
4d6 SDC, +1 Initiative, Horror +4

2. Doll-like features
-make small and cute
+6 PB, Size reduced by 17, Horror, +10

3. Flower child
-add tiny flowers, make it cute/sweet, more attractive, bugs wont attack
1D6 SDC, 1D6 MA, +7PB


4.Over-sized carnivorous mouth
-perfect for chomping
2D6 SDC, +1 Horror

5.No face
- a completely smooth surface, hides the mouth.
+4 Horror

6.Plasmoid
-make it jelly-like
4D6 SDC +1 Horror

7. Plastic
-make the whole thing look plastic or rubber
5D6 SDC, +1 Horror

8. Unusual skin color
-completely white
+1 Horror

9.Misshapen facial features
-the cat eyes, perfectly round and black, the nose small and yellow
+3 Horror

10.Weapon hand
-just for the hell of it, two daggers (turns out you can change the hands into weapons at will,m so they can be normal hands at some point.)
+2 strike/perry, +2 Horror


Put that together and what do you have?!













FEAR HER!!!


I don't know how to do all the different calculations and what not. But I do know that she has a horror factor of 27.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Deja Vue Much?


I would not recommend reading this blog if you are planning on seeing the movie S. Darko.
Therefor, I suggest you read this blog, instead of watching such a horrid and monotonous flick.

Imagine this:
Take every event that happened in Donnie Darko, every little event, tweak it juuuuuuuuuust slightly, and make it...bad. A monstrous heap of shabby allusions
**Spoilers**

Burn down a building
Movie theater scene
Car wreck
Someone dies in a car wreck/gets hit by a car
Worm holes
Over-done fast motion cloud shots
Time travel, time travel, time travel
Giant bunny suit
"wake up."
Someone Sparrow
Count-down to the end of the world
Overly-Christian people

Its just one big, bad, reoccurring, poorly executed dream.
Take the acting, make it bad, take the "special effects" and make them worse.
And, of course, the main characters are total bitches.
If you liked Donnie Darko AT ALL, I highly suggest not watching this. If you've never seen Donnie Darko, still, don't watch it. Yes, it is that bad.
And if you go and watch the "making of", everyone involved even says that they were reluctant to do it, some cast members even said that they didn't want to be involved. They even KNEW that they should toy with such a thing. Too bad they didn't listen.




At least they didn't play Mad World...

Monday, June 1, 2009

Chips and Dip

My house currently smells of sage and ranch dip. Funny what all the different characters I know can bring to the table. Well. The coffee table.
Or, perhaps, the RP table.

The drama is ever ensuing as always. The continuous battles of people and their miscommunication, lack of loyalty, and pride that coils their ever bending spine.
Surely they must know that they are indeed weakening themselves with the useless, self absorbed pressure that they place upon their own shoulders. They must see this in one way or another, if not I can;t help but feel some kind of pity for them. Sympathy, no. With hands like shovels they did themselves into a pit, then soon a grave for their own esteem and honor, buried face to the ground.
Alas, off to RP and eat ranch dressing. I have not time for these petty issues.

MWAHAHA

Now that I have spent the passed few hours lookign aroudn on the internet, primarily Ebay for a nice dice set, I have found two. One set was 10 10d, black with red numbers, and the 1 is an Ankh. They're very nice. The other is a 7 dice set of several different kinds, I believe a d4, d6, d10, d12, d20, percent, and one more. I don't recall what though. They were Chessex Ice Blue Precision dice. Very cool.
Well.
As "cool" as polyhedronal dice can get...

While looking at the facebook, it really seems like all of the kids that are seniors this year at my old schoo do NOT want to go on the senior trip.
(Senior trip- a 3 day trip to the middle of bumfucknowherevirginia with no cell phone service where the seniors of the school or encouraged to bond and worship together whilest taking part in semi-widerness activities and jesustime.)
The majority of my class seemed to enjoy it, but if you couldn't already tell by my writings, gettin jesusy up in the highschool hood/wilderness is not number one on my list of favorite things to do in my free time.
It really does seem like the ones that are going this weekend seem to be dreading it more than anyone would imagine. I will have to investigate further to see what the matter could be.
Moving on.
I have one hour of tutoring left to go to before I take my exam tomorrow. I had best pass it this time. If not there will be some incredible problems. Let us hope for the best.
After my tutoring I will go pick up Van from work and then we will return back to our comfortable home and I shall sit in my "MWAHAHA!" chair.




Anyhow, i just got disracted by feeding a crow and now I may be late for tutoring. I shall return, blogworld.