Sunday, April 12, 2009

Meowth, That's Right!

Scratch that.
I am so not sleeping tonight.

For some reason, I cannot sleep in my room anymore. I always had trouble sleeping when I lived in my house anyway and I never knew why. Still don't. There must be something in here that is keeping me awake, giving me these eerie things. There is always something dashing by out of the corner of my eye, or crawling up. I really don't know what any of it is, but I don't like it being here. A few minutes ago I tried to get rid of it, but nothing really worked, I tried what I could. The last few times I slept here I couldn't sleep and was up all night with the lights on. It's gotten to that point again. I can only sleep well in my dorm or at Van or Chux house, that's about it. It's not like my room is a scary place. Yeah, I do have a poster from the grudge and a porcelain doll that stares at me in my sleep, but those aren't really the scary things. I even have a Meowth stuffed animal; that could make anything not scary anymore, but for some reason, my room is just plain creepy. I need to get my tree friends over here to do something about it. This whole house is crawling with things. I don't even know what most of it is, I can just tell that it's there, keeping me from walking in the hallways at night. There is no way in hell I could walk around my house at night. I get freaked out walking from my room to the bathroom and it is literally 8 feet away. Two steps. Its just so creepy and gives off such bad vibes.

Sleep sounds absolutely wonderful right about now, but I keep waking up. It is horrid.
Someone come make everything better? My feet are cold.


Better think of my answers now because I know the questions will be asked. Like if I brought the joy I found in the confessions of a mask. The tip of my tongue's already touching the top of my mouth. It's meaning manifest in mercy burning down the house. It's true that tactless teem totem-poles turn tolerance to tired taboos. It's true that a bullet never knocks on the door, it's about to come crashing through. Walking one last mile in big steps as your alter-wine; doing it in tattered shoes that aren't even mine because my own are in a box locked up with possessions I can't have. Like the gunman with his future and the prison priest's golden calf. Blindfolds aside I'd probably still close my eyes and try to feel a trembling fetal life inside that shotgun barrel that's about to make me bleed. Like an ulcer in the stomach of the beast. Like a little girl on a bed that was years ago deceased. Resurrected last night with a letter she can't trace, resurrected to be killed and maybe born again; I'll always be Kezia so long as any hope remains.

Very good song, but I do not like the way they pronounce Kezia. The way they do is probably the correct way, but who knows. There is Caroline (care-oh-lin) and Caroline (Care-oh-line), along with Madeline (Mad-uh-lin) and Madeline (Mad-uh-line). They pronounce is kuh-ZI-uh with a long "I" sound, while I pronounce is KEZ-ee-uh. Hm. They way they pronounce it does sound more biblical, which makes sense considering it is a biblical name.
I could seriously listen to Protest The Hero all night long. The more I listen, the more I like them. They really are one of the most amazing bands I have ever heard in my entire life. It would actually be worth buying their album instead of just downloading it. They are worth giving my money to. That will now be on my list of things to do. Until then I will sit here and listen to them happily and not think about the scary things in my room. Perhaps I will fall asleep at my laptop. At least my face will be warm.

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