The Beer by Kimya Dawson

The beer i had for breakfast was a bottle of mad dog and my 20/20 vision was fifty percent off. You said punch-buggy red and punched me right in my left eye, i said don't you mean pediddle? and i lit his house on fire. He came home on acid i was holding his shotgun. i was dressed like tina turner in beyond thunder dome. He said don't shoot, i said i won't i love you you're my friend. i handed him my wig and shot myself in the head. then i stuffed a box of tissues in the hole in my skull, i got in my mazda and i drove to the mall. i got a big johnson shirt and some silicone tits, when i pulled out the tissues they were covered with shit. and the beer i had for breakfast was a box of cheap white wine and the boom box on my shoulder was a box of clementines. i ate every single one without noticing the mold. you said "you're gross my darling", i said "no i'm rock and roll". even though i'd never ever been in a band i got cool as black ice tattooed on my hand. and the christians gave me comic books as if i would be scared of burning in hell well i was already there. and the beer i had for breakfast silver bullet in the brain and the beer i had for lunch was a bottle of night train and the beer i had for dinner was my crazy neighbor's pills. we had to sit down on skateboards jut to make it down the hill. then i peed my pants and you stole the groom's cigar and some old man made me watch him masturbate locked in his car. when i got back to the apartment you were face down on the floor. you said "don't go to bed yet let's go get a 64" and the beer i had had for breakfast was a pint of jim beam and a fifth of peach schnapps and some warm sunny d. and you said "bottoms up" just as i bottomed out. i tried to scream fuck you but blood was pouring out my mouth. evan dando never planned on telling you the truth and your leonardo i.d. card is your fountain of youth. you can be a teenager for your whole fucking life, just find some pretty sucker and make that bitch your wife. i guess by now you all know my friends danny broke his neck, he was driving home from sirens when he got into a wreck. first i cried for him and then i cried for me, haunted by the ghost of the girl i used to be. but the rocks with holes are warm in my hands and i buried my toes in the hot hot sand and the silver pink pony kisses me and says "you've come a long, long way and you deserve to be really happy."